My little Munky

The last couple of days have been surreal. I took little Munky to the vet to get spayed and pampered, the whole nine yards, and realized when it was finally time to hand her over, I started to cry. I felt like I was putting my little childs life in someone else's hands. The nurse was so nice tho. She totally didn't make me feel stupid or anything,...I just felt so scared. She was so nice and sat with Munky and I and explained all the things they do to make everything more comfortable for her afterwards. They said she would be ready to go by 1 o'clock and it was 8am,...so I ran home, fell back asleep for a couple of hours, woke-up practically ready to throw-up from my nerves,....went to the gym anyways, and they called true to their word at 1 o'clock, and I swear, there was no stopping me once they finally called. I jumped in my car, sweat soaked clothes and all, threw my gym bag in the backseat, and high-tailed it there, again, practically in tears. I got there in record time, and soon as she saw me she meowed the saddest little noise I ever heard her make. I did cry then. I got her home, with her little satellite collar on, and poor thing was so out of it, she walked in circles, and bumped into walls. I stayed with her the entire time. I spoon fed her cause she couldn't get to the food so well, and gave her water with a eye-dropper. She kept waking up smacking her dry little tongue, so I would give her more water. She stayed next to me for probably 20 hours straight sleeping, and getting comfortable. I was like a mother hen,....my husband thought I was taking it all too serious, but I couldn't help it. I love her so much. Scared me to death too. I realize how much I do love her. Even when she was at the vet, I sat and looked around the house, with all her toys, and stuff ALL OVER THE HOUSE, and I got so upset, because it seemed so empty without her there. How did I ever live without her with us? I can't remember. Sugar is being a meany to us, but I still baby him when I see him. I do whatever I can for him, believe me. I bring his food out to him,...I brought out his favorite blanket and put it on the patio couch so he can sleep on it when he feels like it. I go for walks with him, in the rare event he shows up when I come home from work, like we used to do. I miss him,....but he doesn't give me a choice, short of hunting the neighborhood down looking for him. So, I even called in late to work to stay a couple extra hours with Munky, ---I felt so bad leaving her. It was so hard. I stopped myself from calling every hour to check on her,....but I'm home now, and found her sleeping in our bed all curled up on my side under the blanket. I was so damn excited to see her. She's still a little fuzzy-eyed, but she follows me from room to room, so I know she knows whats going on a little more now. I'm just happy she's home, clean bill of health, and she's my little kid. I'm so content with her near,....it's scary.